I’m not quite ready for Friday - give me a few mins ok.
I’m not quite ready for Friday - give me a few mins ok.
2021-04-09 07:25:36 +0000 UTC View Post
ukgnome1 posts
Shaved head and fluffy beard. Like nature intended.
Shaved head and fluffy beard. Like nature intended.
2021-04-02 20:28:29 +0000 UTC View PostAnyone fancy a starring contest?
Anyone fancy a starring contest?
2021-03-28 19:38:48 +0000 UTC View Post
I have done the smooth buzzy razor thing.
I have done the smooth buzzy razor thing.
2021-03-20 21:04:18 +0000 UTC View PostMore pants - I’m not as keen on these ones though.
More pants - I’m not as keen on these ones though.
2021-03-16 21:42:53 +0000 UTC View PostGet a job that lets you dress how you damn well please.
Get a job that lets you dress how you damn well please.
2021-03-13 11:26:24 +0000 UTC View Post
Just me and Rory having a chill. Shout out to all the black..
Just me and Rory having a chill. Shout out to all the black cat lovers.
2021-03-11 09:44:10 +0000 UTC View PostMore boxers - I’ve totally refreshed my undies draw.
More boxers - I’ve totally refreshed my undies draw.
2021-03-09 21:43:54 +0000 UTC View PostI have some rather awesome boxer shorts
I have some rather awesome boxer shorts
2021-03-02 21:45:36 +0000 UTC View PostNot sure what I’m thinking, but I’m sure it’s fun.
Not sure what I’m thinking, but I’m sure it’s fun.
2021-02-25 08:51:38 +0000 UTC View PostCouldn’t even be bothered to open my eyes. That’s how lazy I..
Couldn’t even be bothered to open my eyes. That’s how lazy I am
2021-02-20 08:12:21 +0000 UTC View PostEven though I’m an exhibitionist I sometimes take a picture ..
Even though I’m an exhibitionist I sometimes take a picture that I really like. Today I took this one.
2021-02-16 22:16:44 +0000 UTC View PostOnly freaks wear pink - wanna get freaky?
Only freaks wear pink - wanna get freaky?
2021-02-15 15:59:55 +0000 UTC View PostPicnic Packing up the plates and packets the sun danced on..
Picnic Packing up the plates and packets the sun danced on their faces. With everything packed away they lay on the green. Fortunately there were not many people around, and they were obscured. We began kissing. Our tongues exploring each other’s mouths. What you wasn’t expecting was my hands to run inside your top. The touch of my soft slender fingers on your skin sending shivers up your spine and a smile to your face. As my tongue explored your mouth my hands reached the side of your breasts. The slightest touch sending charges of electricity to you. As my palms took the weight of you soft orbs my thumbs began rubbing over your nipples. Responding straight away to my touch your nipples start to harden and push against the flimsy material of your bra. Then an idea fills my head and I reach around and undo the clasp of your bra. In an instant you pull your bra off, letting it fall to your side. As we kneel facing each other, still kissing. My hands on your tits, your nipples being pulled and played with. Each gentle pull making you kiss me more deeply. You hands snake their way up my t-shirt. Your nails drag up my body. The sensation causing me to pause as you focus on my chest. The feeling as you claw my chest make me moan in pleasure. The sound emanating from me fills you full of excitement. Slowly you move one hand down my chest and rest it on my waist. Your hand pulling at my belt buckle, trying to free some space so that you can get down the front of my jeans. As you popped my buckle you undo the button of my jeans and your slender hand snakes inside. To show my approval I kiss you, my tongue playing with your tongue. My fingers squeezing your nipple as your hand slides into my boxers it’s nails scrape my balls. My cock hard in my pants, pre-cum droplets on my tip. Your hands give my balls a squeeze, your nails dig in as you move your hand to my shaft. As your fingers encircle my hard cock you start to wank me in my pants. I desperately want to feel your pussy but can’t get a hand to slide into your pant. So I start rubbing your crotch through your pants. Pushing my fingers hard against your crotch I can feel how damp you are. The slippery pussy juice can be felt though your joggers. Pushing a little more I whisper for you to stand. Without effort we both stand. Your hand still down my pants slowly wanking my hard cock. Now we are standing my hand is able to slip down your waistband and in to your knickers. As my fingers slide down your shaven bald slit you tighten your grip on my cock. As we stand, still kissing our hands in each other pants. You hand wanking rhythmically as my fingers find your wet little hole and bury themselves knuckle deep inside you. I can feel your pussy grip my fingers as I push them in time to your wanking. With my free hand I pull you in close. Then slightly pull down your waist band and kickers at the front. Taking the hint you also do the same. As we both push our hips together I pull my hand from your knickers. Placing my hands on your hips you continue playing with me. I nuzzle you neck, dragging my teeth along your neckline as you rub my cock against your slippery slit. As you build up a steady rhythm I grab your waistband and knickers and pull them up and open. Your hand still working my throbbing cock. Wank me I tell you, wank me into your knickers. As I grunt out the words I start to erupt. Thick ropes of my cum splash into your knickers. Once drained I let go of your joggers. Your cum filled knickers making you smile.
2021-02-13 22:59:46 +0000 UTC View Post
Some people think it’s too cold to eat ice lollies - I am no..
Some people think it’s too cold to eat ice lollies - I am not some people.
2021-02-12 06:20:57 +0000 UTC View PostI think I’d of made a good Roman - just lounging around wait..
I think I’d of made a good Roman - just lounging around waiting to be fed grapes.
2021-02-10 08:10:37 +0000 UTC View PostI usually start the day at the sink. I’m sure my neighbours ..
I usually start the day at the sink. I’m sure my neighbours appreciate the spectacle.
2021-02-09 07:52:36 +0000 UTC View PostWith all the snow there is only one place I’d like to be.
With all the snow there is only one place I’d like to be.
2021-02-08 15:52:54 +0000 UTC View PostI mean - even I have questions. And yet here I am, wearing a..
I mean - even I have questions. And yet here I am, wearing a sort of elephant.
2021-02-07 09:46:57 +0000 UTC View PostRather embarrassed you asked if I could drive you to the big..
Rather embarrassed you asked if I could drive you to the big supermarket. That’s always going to be a yes, not because I enjoy supermarkets, it’s just the mischief that I particularly enjoy. Saying inappropriate things in a loud voice. Filling a grannies trolly with play lube. That sort of thing. It was fun getting close in the frozen aisle. Deliberately making your nipples protrude though your t-shirt. I was in full distraction mode. After the fun of shopping, my hand on your waist as you paid. Almost dipping down the front of your joggers we get back to yours. Only putting away what you needed to, frozen and fridge items you practically pull me toward you. The built up tension from shopping too much. You had an itch that needed to be scratched. Entwined in your arms you feverishly kiss me passionately. Your hands kneading at my buttocks as you rub yourself against me. As we kiss, our tongues exploring each other’s mouth I can feel your hands working the buckle of my trousers. Like a woman possessed you soon have my trousers around my ankle and your hand gripping my hard cock tightly through my shorts. I reach down my hand, and through your joggers begin pushing against your pussy. I can feel your wetness through you trousers. Your knickers must be so wet for me to feel it through your joggers too. Two of my fingers work your clit through your trousers as you grind on them. Your fingers still gripping my hard shaft through my boxers. Your mouth still exploring mine. Using both my hands I tug at your trousers and let them fall to your ankles. Snaking one hand on to your back my other goes back to you crotch. I wasn’t wrong, your knickers wouldn’t be able to hold any more. As I tease and rub my fingers are sodden in your pussy juice. It’s not long before your hands are in my boxers. One hand cupping my balls. Your nails digging in. Your other hand gripping my hard cock and wanking me hard. As your hands work away a bit more I feel my boxers slide down to my ankles. As they disappear your nails dig into my balls a little bit causing me to gasp with pleasure. This makes my fingers jab at your wet slit through your damp slippery knickers, pushing past your material they touch your slippery folds and you let out a whimper. As soon as you do I stop what one doing. Taking hold of your wrists I move them from my cock, a smile flashes over my face. With a little hop up I sit on the kitchen worktop. Instantly you lean forward and begin sucking my cock. One hand holding the shaft to help you greedily feed yourself my hard cock. The other under my balls, gently stoking them. The view as I look down is magnificent. You look up, your eyes grinning as you lick and suck on my bulbous head. My hands grabbing at your t-shirt. Raising your hands in the air you pull off your top and go back to sucking on my slippery pole. Not knowing where to put my hands I put one one the back of your head and instinctively you bob your head fully down. Taking and holding my cock all in your mouth. Your eyes glaze as you deep throat me. As I look down to watch my free hand accidentally knock over a can of squity cream. I put all sensations out of my head as I gently prise the lid off. Timing it perfectly as you face fuck my cock I let out a quick squirt. You stop what you’re doing and look up. As you do I spray more whipped cream, coating my hard cock and your tits. Taking my slippery cock in your hand you start sliding it over your tits. Them also slippery from the spray of cream. Mixing the cream, using my hard cock to spread this sticky mixture over your tits. Then, with almost an animal lust you begin to each and slurp the whipped cream off. As I jump down from the counter you think that I want you up on the counter. And you’re half right. First though I take off my top and begin kissing you. The sticky cream in my beard. Your warm sticky slippery tits pressed against my chest. Taking the can of cream I pull the waistband of your knickers and press the nozzle. Your wet knickers rapidly fill with the spray cream. The sensation is like nothing you’d experienced. I squirted so much that the cream was sliding down your legs. When finished with your front I sprayed the cream down the back of your knickers too. Then I invited you to sit on the worktop. As you put your weight down on your arse the cream tried to escape any way it could. The confused yet sexy look on your face told me that you were loving this. Pushing your legs open I place my face between them and at the same time hook my fingers in your knickers and tug them down. The anticipation of my tongue on your creamy hole builds. The sensation as I try to lick and eat all the cream sends you into orgasm. As your pussy spasms it spits cream over my face and beard, undeterred my tongue continues working away. Now it’s your hand on the back of my head. Pushing me in to your sticky slippery creamy snatch. As it’s getting slippery in the worktop you jump down to the floor. Laying down you open your legs, my fingers all over you. Mingling your juice with the messy cream. You gasping as I flash two fingers into you. It’s then I get an idea. Taking the squirty cream I put the nozzle inside you. As you realise what I’m doing you let out a small cry of yes. With a hiss you feel the sensation. Your pussy filled with the cream. Looking at you, your body all sticky and glistening from the cream assault. I muse, do I suck the cream out of you, or. I pause for what seems like an eternity before positioning my hard cock between your legs. With a slippery thrust I oust the cream as I push deep into your cream filled hole. Spraying cream out of you with each thrust. The gurgling squelch with each thrust sends us both in to giggles. It was then another idea filled my mind. You must of read my mind as you lifted your knees and spread your legs. Taking the nozzle again I spray filled your sticky slippery pussy with more cream. They taking the nozzle I pushed it into your tight bum hole. As I squirted you gasped and mewed. Your face all flushed, your pussy and arse full of squirty cream you ask me to fuck you again. This time nice and slowly I push in to you. Cream sprays for both your holes as I slowly build a rhythm. The sensation is almost too much as I continue fucking your messy creamy hole. As my eyes start to blink you squeeze me slippery cock with your sticky hole. On my face you beg. So kneeling beside your head I start to wank. You reach up, grabbing my slippery cream covered balls. As your fingers brush past my arse and toy my rim I begin to pump. My cum splashes your face, your mouth open waiting to catch as much as you can. My cock slides and rubs your face as I finish. As I collapse next to you in a creamy sticky slippery mess.
2021-02-06 11:38:33 +0000 UTC View PostDo I do requests? Yes Will I eat biscuits messily for you? Y..
Do I do requests? Yes Will I eat biscuits messily for you? Yes 😂🤣😂
2021-02-05 22:19:08 +0000 UTC View Post
Sometimes when at work I like to strip. Sure I have a very s..
Sometimes when at work I like to strip. Sure I have a very sensible job. And I guess I’m quite recognisable. I had posted this on my fabswingers profile and the cleaner noticed. That was a delightfully awkward conversation.
2021-02-05 17:32:13 +0000 UTC View PostRoutine It takes me about two minutes to look this good. I’..
Routine It takes me about two minutes to look this good. I’m super pleased with my soft skin and beard. The secret is a small dash of aloe Vera.
2021-02-04 09:48:39 +0000 UTC View PostDid you ever wake up and want to join the cult of Cthulhu?
Did you ever wake up and want to join the cult of Cthulhu?
2021-02-04 08:15:28 +0000 UTC View PostThis has long been one of my fave pics / so chucking it here..
This has long been one of my fave pics / so chucking it here as a throwback - such a happy spatula wielder.
2021-02-03 14:43:37 +0000 UTC View Post