I just wanted to take a moment to say a few words about the ..

I just wanted to take a moment to say a few words about the events that unfolded at Club Q on Saturday the 19th of November, 2022. For a moment to step out of the fantasies and the erotica, and be real. Who I am in my "entertainment" life is a far cry from who I am in my actual real life. What happened on Saturday night, was an attack not just on a bar, but on a vibrant part of the fabric of our American way of life. for that reason, I wanted to address it at myself and not my "Online Character". As stated in my profile I am a professional commercial and industrial photographer in Memphis, TN. I am also a bartender at a major event venue here in the city. On the 19th, the bar that I work at, although not a gay bar, but very welcoming to ALL in the community, and centered in the middle of one of Memphis' three arts districts, was hosting a Trans Resource Fair to commemorate the Trans Day of Remembrance Weekend. That night, a lot like Club Q did in Colorado Springs, we hosted a fun and exciting drag show event. Everyone was having a good time, music was pumping, people were dancing, and drinks were flowing. My partner and I were both working, me behind one of the two bars in the space, and them working for our photography and media company, volunteering our services to document the event. We had no idea that at the same time one of the queens in Memphis was singing a song about "be who you are and do what you want, I am not special and neither are you, nothing really matters anyway" that 1100 miles away people were being attacked, fleeing a venue for their lives, and dying on the dance floor they had only moments before been having a good time on. On the way home, after hearing the news, our minds went to the fact that it could have been us, it could have been here in Memphis, It could have been at our bar, at our event. It could have been our friends, our co-workers, or either of us. The senseless violence against the LGBTQ+ community has to stop. The hate has to stop. I know that in my "character" of "Big Daddy Master Buck" that I sometimes toss out conservative spiel, overly dominate alphas male toxicity, and exaggerated macho BS bravado. That is just an act. It's not real. Its a parody of the ludicrousness that those types exist in. I create a character that caters to the fantasy that I get paid to give. When I am not in "character", when it is just me at home, the real me, I take off my pants, I pop open a beer, and I sit down with my partner of 24 years to eat dinner and watch something on streaming with our two cats and our dog. I look at my family, at my life, and I am thankful that I have made it through another day without being attacked for who I am or who my friends are. That those friends are as safe as I am, sitting in their homes, laying in their beds once again. But I also know that the day may come when that may not be the case. That thought scares the hell out of me. It honestly fucking terrifies me. It shakes me to my very core. Our thoughts are with the victims of Club Q, our hopes are with their families for closure and justice, our prayers and energies are with the survivors for healing both physical and mental, and our fight is for the peace and equality that we all should be able to share in, safely. To be who we are, to live how we want, to love who we love, and to not have to die for it. This Thanksgiving, I am thankful that I have a great couple of jobs, wonderful friends, and an amazing community that surrounds me. I am also thankful that there was not more bloodshed, thankful that there was not more senseless loss of innocent life. I am thankful for the heroes that stopped the shooter, and for the police who responded so quickly, with no regard for where the attack was happening or who the victims were, only knowing that people were in trouble. I am thankful that another night, another week has come and gone and me and my partner are safe together. That we were able to sit in a restaurant and eat our Thanksgiving meal together, not planning funerals instead. I am saddened for those that were lost, and I am hopeful that justice will be served to the shooter, Most of all I am hopeful that one day posts like this are no longer necessary. #loveislove #clubqstrong #equality #lgbtqcommunity #LGBTQSafe #hopeful #OneDay #thanksgiving2022