***CAMGIRL MEMOIR 16 - BOUNDARIES PT. 2*** **2011** A few ..

***CAMGIRL MEMOIR 16 - BOUNDARIES PT. 2***

**2011**

A few days later I noticed almost all of my tippers were hanging in my chatroom so I announced to chat that I'd take my bra off while wearing a totally see through lingerie dress. I drew a thermometer on a white board and for every 100tks I'd do a little tease and paint over a piece of the thermometer. At the top I drew a pair of boobs.

Visualizing the goal would make it more appealing, I thought.
As soon as I displayed the board the bells went off.

**"Whoa this worked faster than I expected"**

***Mr Pimp tipped 900 tokens and left a message: "That's it? I feel lucky. Dance to this song*** - and sent a link.

Mr Pimp visited me before but this time he was tipping very well and finished every goal I had that night.

My chatroom reached 130 people for the first time and that made me want to scream. As someone always used to the upper double digits, seeing triple made me feel very popular.

I did enjoy the adrenaline kick in from the positive response, and after I started going through my husband's alcohol shelf and offering to take vodka shots for tips the money started rolling in even more.

Someone requested me to dance to Cupid's Shuffle. And I genuinely just had the most fun I had not had in awhile.

I only flashed my breasts a couple of times and danced a lot.

~~~

***MrPimp: I will keep finishing your topics if you want to keep doing shows like that***

***Mr Pimp: You should get these lingeries (sent me the link) and show me how they look on you when they arrive.***

And sent me an Amazon Gift Card.

I complied.

~~~

***Mr Pimp: Yes this one looks super hot. Can you twerk in that for me a little bit? Yes that's hot.. Now the next one?"***

I felt like I was being coached.

***Mr Pimp: Meh that one doesn't look that good on your ass and makes your boobs look weird. Maybe you can ask for a refund and get something else..***

*"I thought maybe I should get fake boobs... my husband told me I'd probably look better. But most pornstars he has showed me had weird fake looking ones in my opinion."*

***Mr Pimp: Yeah its a matter of taste I think. Fake boobs are hot as long as you don't put salines. My ex's tits felt like a ball of sand. The gel ones are very soft. You have enough tits that it will probably feel natural still so don't worry much***

***Mr Pimp: Can you take everything off for me just this one time?***

***Mr Pimp: Why do you care if it leaks.. I'm sure someone already leaked you online. Hold on...***

My boobs shaking around as I went "to the right to the right to the right to the right", my ass shaking more as I went "now kick, now kick, now kick, now kick" and a shameless loose smile with smudged red lipstick as I walked by myself. - obviously dru.nk out of my mind.

This is how I looked in my first ever leaked video, at least in the link Mr Pimp sent.
The title read: Sexy nerdy girl dancing.

I freaked.
Luckily (and curiously) I was still clothed in the video.

*"How did you find this?"*

***Mr Pimp: I guess I just know where to look...***

~~~

***Mr Pimp: Btw. .yeah I agree you look great now but if you get your breasts done then you will be a bombshell. I agree with him. It will complement your hips. Get small implants and it will look great.***

Deep down I didn't care about their opinions. I also thought I'd look much prettier and be more confident.

~~~

January 2012 - A special gift to myself

I walked into the sporting goods store I worked at and sent a vacation request note to the manager. At the end of my shift he called me into his office.

***"So what is going on? Do you just want to visit your family?"*** - He asked me.

**"Yes I will also have a procedure so when I return I won't be able to sweep the floors on closing hours"**

***"A surgery? What for?"***

**"Ah..my.. chest"**

***"Oh wow oh okay. I got it. I didn't think you needed it. I didn't imagine. Sorry . You have been working with us over 1 year. No questions asked. You can have your break no problem. I hope you have a good day.*** - He blushed and dismissed me.

~~~

My husband and I had been even more distant around this time, however we did have a nice trip planned to the mountains on the next morning, right after my doctor appointment for a full pre op check up. That was something to look forward to.

I had to wake up at 6am and drive in the early morning icy road, carefully letting the car slide by itself onto the road.

**"What won't a woman do to get what she wants..."** - I laughed to myself.

The Army had a very nice clinic on base for all military families. They took awhile to call me but once I got in the room the nurse asked me to remove my shirt and my bra and wear the clinic's top.

The doctor arrived soon. I had seen him chatting loudly in the corridor. He was a youn.g man in his early 30's. He asked what I was there for and I mentioned I needed a breast examination for implants' pre op. He looked down my cleavage and said:

***"Really? It doesn't look like you need it. Lay down so I can examine you"***

He asked me to open my top and started to fondle my breasts without looking away, as doctors usually do (I didn't know that yet though). He took his time to press on it all over and even listened to my heart beat while my clothes were unnecessarily open. Then he examined my breasts a second time around the nipples.

It felt like an eternity and as soon as he finished I closed my top quickly.
There was this intense distinct tingle in my stomach that one usually feels when they are in danger or violated. But nothing really obvious to me had happened so I couldn't say why.

I sat down and the doctor went on saying everything was fine and he didn't have a reason to stop me from getting the surgery done.

***"But can I request you something? Please, don't do it. Think about it more. Your breasts are very healthy as they are. They look perfectly fine as is"***

**"Thanks. I'm.. very set on the idea."**

***"Can you please open your top for me to check one more thing?"***

I opened the top confused.

His eyes looking straight at my chest before I even finished opening the button. Once they were out he placed both hands, one on each of my breasts and pushed them together very gently for a few seconds as if he was measuring them.

My stomach turning and my head feeling dizzy. "Is this appropriate?" I just wanted to leave.

I look at the nurse standing behind the doctor and she is looking straight at the door almost as if she was a soldier herself. I wanted her to look at what was happening and give me a confirmation that this was all very inappropriate, but she didn't move her eyes from the door. Not even a glimpse.

I looked back at the doctor.

***"Listen, they are really really perfect and healthy. Please promise me you will think a little more about getting this surgery"*** - He said, while his eyes moved back and forth from my breasts to my face a couple of times. He smiled "kindly".

**"O.."** - My voice failed - **"Okay I will think about it"** - I was screaming inside. Feeling horribly freaked out but also feeling I didn't have any proof that anything wrong was happening. I just wanted to get out of there with my "boob job permission".

With his hands still placed on the outer side of each of my breasts, he gave them one long long last look and sighted.

***"Please put your clothes back on while I prepare the paperwork"***
The nurse excused herself and said she had to leave now that I was clothed because they needed her in the other room.

I felt I wanted to cry but I didn't let it show. Nothing had happened, I told myself.
He finished signing the paper and handed it to me. I grabbed on it but before letting it go, he said:

***"Think about what I told you... But return here even if you get the surgery done"*** - and smiled. I tried to smile back and walked out quickly.

I drove out of the parking lot and on the first red light that my car stopped I started crying. I felt violated and I didn't know to explain why and how. I also didn't feel like I could do anything about it. I could still feel his hands on my breasts. More than anything I was crying because I was furious.

Yes! That's the word! I was furious! I punched the wheel: "Not again!!!"

I look at the clock and notice I was 10 min. late for the time my husband set we had to drive off so I just kept on driving. The icy roads were completely melted now.

My husband was so pissed off when I got home. He hated being late. Although we were just driving to the mountains. I told him something weird had happened at the clinic and started explaining the way the doctor examined me. The tears rolled down as I talked, but my voice was firm.

***"You probably imagined things. They always have a female nurse in the room"*** - he interrupted me - ***"Let's go! We are already late for check-in."***

I held back the tears and didn't speak of it ever again. In fact I was so furious that I felt eerily calm.

.

When we returned from another sexless argumentative trip I had an Amazon delivery waiting at the door.

Three new costumes: A maid, a black outfit with a booty spanker and a nurse costume, ironically.

The guys online seemed so much better than the real life guys at this point...at least on MFC I could have full control.

Two things I promised myself: 1. No one would ever touch me against my will without severe repercussions ever again. 2. No one would make me doubt myself ever again.

Later I had to add more promises to the list.

To be continued...

P.S: I found out a couple of years later the doctor got fired for unethical behavior. I guess I wasn't the only one..