I want to get a lot of tattoos. I won’t yet and don’t plan o..

I want to get a lot of tattoos. I won’t yet and don’t plan on it for many years to come, however one of the main ones that I want to get tattooed on my wrists for a daily reminder is “Entitled to work, not the fruit”. It’s a phrase that has had some pretty big impact on my life this last year and has sort of helped me keep going. My mind really got derailed for a bit there and I’m working on actively forming new pathways in my brain to change that. The original phrase actually comes from the Bhagavad Gita and goes (according to online translations) ***“You have the right to work, but for the work's sake only. You have no right to the fruits of work. Desire for the fruits of work must never be your motive in working. Never give way to laziness, either…….. ………They who work selfishly for results are miserable.”*** ― Bhagavad Gita What I took that to mean was basically that I need to stop getting so hung up on results, how much clout I get, how many people care (always a personal struggle), and what the overall outcome of my product results in because it has made me miserable. I’ve always enjoyed creating content for the sake of creating the content, not for the sake of the fame, the cash, the views, the awards, the followers, or the clout. **Some of my best stuff still has yet to be released** just because I’ve never really enjoyed the post part of production as much as the actual production part of shooting. I would like to be able to enjoy shooting content and working again instead of getting hung up on stuff that doesn’t even matter as much and still hasn’t even happened yet. Basically, I need to live in the moment more, and focus on getting back to that instead of obsessing over the details as much. Editing, marketing, and selling videos are not nearly as much fun as actually making them. Shocker right? I know. Well lucky for you guys I really do genuinely enjoy shooting and **as soon as I’m healthy enough to do so** I will get back to it full time. I think right now I just have a lot of mental stuff I need to work through as well as physical problems such as heart problems and an autoimmune disease. That being said, obviously with my upcoming open heart surgery, and just probably in general **it’s time I eliminate the parts of production I do not like and automate them to hopefully ai at this point.** I’ve been doing some research so that I can basically just build a template for how all of my content will be distributed, so when I finish a video I can basically upload it to one place and it automatically starts a process to spiderweb its way down the distribution line. Because I do and always have enjoyed filming, it appears **I actually have months worth of content built up** that I can slowly start to release at one new video a week. I have to figure out the editing process because right now that is one of the biggest time leeches. **If there is anyone on here that is a writer and knows how to edit and would like to help please feel free to speak up** otherwise right now I’m working on fine tuning my editing system. I recently pulled a full length CockNinja video out of the vault which I have to make some creative decisions on which are a lot trickier than I thought. Thankfully, my skill set and knowledge on general mass market consumption has gone up so I generally have some sort of idea of where I want to go with it however the creative in me wants to go over the top with it and make the entire thing one big art project. We shall see. I’m working on releasing control of stuff so that I can focus on my health and recovery during this time. It may end up being a decision I let ride with the editor or person that ends up helping me distribute and upload all the content. That being said, I’m going to do everything I can to focus on getting video releases completely automated this upcoming week so that when I do go in for surgery I can still have some income coming in and you guys will get a whole bunch of new content including multiple boy/girl scenes, hardcore BDSM lesbian videos, cosplay epics, you name it. It’s honestly all very exciting. If things go well enough during that time then I will begin working on producing my own mainstream, HBO style TV series. I’ll be living in LA due to surgery stuff so might as well start chasing my dreams there somewhat I guess right? I also want to go back to school to some extent but that is a topic for another day and something I can wait and hold off on for sure. Even if things don’t get crazy big and I don’t become some super successful, rich and famous porn star making shit tons of money every month and I can’t raise the funds needed to transition to longer full length epic movies then honestly, fuck it, I’m entitled to the work not the rewards. If I want to make the tv series happen I may just need to break my back to make that happen too and honestly if that is the case, then so be it, I don’t care, **I’m going to do it because it’s something I personally want to do and will enjoy doing.** I love you guys and am extremely thankful for your support during this time. There are so few people that actually do step up and helpout, especially lately with post covid no sympathy style minds trending. You guys mean the world to me and it means so much that you enjoy watching that which I enjoy creating for you to watch. It’s a great symbiotic relationship and one which I hope to foster and see continue to grow for the rest of my life honestly. I really do enjoy my job, my life and am extremely thankful for the chance and opportunity to do so. Thank you guys so much, and I hope I can make you as happy as you have and continue to make me. ##So much new content just waiting to be released, if you guys think you’ve seen the best of me so far, you ain't seen nothing yet.## Goal is new video releases every week starting next week from here on out. I’m really hoping I can have one ready to go out as a thank you to everyone on here that has been supporting me and unlocking PPV’s even if they already have some of the videos. You guys the true MVPs. ***Also - NOTE : I know this may not be the traditional place for deep thoughts and long drawn out blog posts but if you came to my page wanting personal, private sides of me then there is nothing more personal than my writing. There are pictures of my pussy and videos of my asshole all over the internet, this stuff is far less spread.***